no, im still trying no matter wht. u told me not to give up, so wtf r u doing now? telling me all those crap tht u obviously noe i wont listen. u noe i wont. call me stubborn, freakky, whtever, im still gg to try. i dont care.

fine, this week is so complicated. oh, so complicated. i sort of regretted, i shld have stayed out of whole thing. get UNinvloved. get it? but its so hard, if u noe me well. i dno sometimes im far more sensible than i tot, at least i said things i didn expect sufen to say. she became rational enough to noe whts wrong n whts right. maybe it didn happen on her, thus she's able to see things v clearly, oh i noe, cuz she has perfect eyesight. ok, tdy is valentine's eve, im gg to own up one thing. i dont have perfect eyesight actually, i have a little agtismasim (uneven cornea, howver u spell this word), so i actually need to wear specs lah. but i only wear it when i rly rly rly cnt see. haha. im so honest. lol. back to topic, sufen said many things. she has good n sound mind n thinks v clearly. i helped my fren afterall, n me n wan went shop for sm present. in attempt to let her be a lil happier, but it breaks a hole in my pocket. lol. seriosly i nv liked go ******** and buy accessories, they sell it so ex, but thts the last option though. so yeah, money spent): sometimes i hope i can save more money, if not i wont be able to get my camera b4 my bdae as bdae present. i think i cnt. haix. i wanted to use my savings, not my take home pay or angpow money. i want myself to put in effort to dave, but v hard leh. i dont love money as much as i tot, cuz i alwaes give it to grinning shopkeepers. haixx. hopeless liao, i spent way too much. u wont believe how many rings i have, how many necklace or bracelets i have. nvm, so back to topic, i hope it ends here. actually i didn want to talk to him abt this, but cuz i rly dont understand lah, so i asked. n i end up only to quarrel with him. wlao, n its lyk fine, im dumber lah. speechless lor. eh, i think i want another piercing. i scared my dad scold lor. whn i went for third he alr v unhappy. n i want dye my hair after olvl!! n i want green contacts. haha. there r so many things to do, i wont end my life yet. cuz i still want to do alot of things. but seriously if its me, if all tht happens to me, i honestly tell u i will jump off a building. i will. cuz wo ben lai jiu bu xiang le. but anw, good thing: manda n clar got entangled in love triangle, i laughed lyk mad. bad thing: we cant meet up tmr cuz clar cnt gd thing: we r still in contact bad thing: i feel drifted. gd thing: tmr is v day bad thing: tmr got co gd thing: i get to see love ones bad thing: i hate the sight of liubin gd thing: im still gg to get sl pts no matter wht bad thing: i cnt control my temper gd thing: i love my new instru bad thing: no more xuan for time being(OMG) gd thing: i get to go out bad thing: whole section in major crisis gd thing: i enjoy talking bad thing: wl sucks. the end, i analysed enough. i m still giving myself not to sort out english entries, i still haven hand in.

fine, school is complicated. n i so not look forward to evening under the stars. lol. but heard abt bonding activities for 4/2, is it even possible? nvm lah. see how it goes.

co tmr at 8am. argh. need wake up early. for this i dont like. i love to sleep, alot alot. u cnt imagine, i rly wanted to slp for hundred yrs n wake up to see totally diff ppl. i heard tht u will meet the exactly same ppl, same things after 25millions year. i dont believe. haha. perhaps lor, but who knows wht will happen. cuz its sooooo looooong. do english sufen, dont slack plss.


i only need u to say "i trust tht u didn say it, i believe u"

21:04:00