oh yeah. my blog is so dead.

do u think i lyk it? erm. lyk duh. no. at least i manage to break free frm all those misc, tht i think i should go away. my heart ache, n i kinda regret doing so, to make u completely hate me, to make u leave me. yea. sort of purposely lah. cuz i noe u vry wei nan. stuck. awkward. so i juz made phone calls. n now u nv tok to me le. happy? no. im not. but is good to noe. 3 of u will be happy. gd enough. time for me to walk away. i will. is juz tht noone can tok to abt co u noe. all those snrs crazyy. yeah. i dunnoe why but i cried after realising theres noone thr to share with me such news ANYMORE. not anymore. so is sad plus happy to receivr tht news. juz tht u r not thr to share anymore.

such relationship is abnormal. i put an end to it. dont take for granted le.

for u. is not tht i dont lyk u. u shld noe by now. but it seems tht u dont lyk me. may it be any reasons, i cant do anyhting. juz to say i dont detest u or anithing. is all, yah. over.

for u. tnks for being thr u noe. i confided in u cuz i trust u. only to noe u hate me so much. yea. i nv knew those little things contributed their part. only i came to noe tht u were, or had been so unhappy. im different from u i guess. i totally dont rmb those things at all. but it caused so much. too much to take. all of us let go. and it caused commotion. tension. even hatred. i mean u said its ok becuz u dont want ppl ard to worry. but its not ok. i noe u dont feel k. i mean why dont u voice out ur opinion long ago. long ago. ur recollection. i dunnoe wht's in there. yea. but since u dont want ppl to tok abt u, then dont do so. if u think im toking abt u, n u start to tok ard. then aft hearing i go tok ard n this is endless. by the time we grow old u will say "u started it" n i'll say "u did". no point. juz stop. i noe u wish for this too. i m not pushing blame. i noe my mistake. i called n apologise. n iwill keep my mouth shut abt u, and anyone else. yea. normal. classmates. although the trust isn there anymore. cuz u misused it as part of ur revenge. u really did. so this is a fact. after this. no more. tnks alot. for being there when i needed a shoulder to lean on. i really 100% trust u when i tok to u. i dunnoe how u take it when i tok to u. i juz know tht u misintepret certain things. so yah. no more. i will not rake up anyhting anymore. hope u too keep this promise.

PAHANG. i love pahang. n i miss there. heehee. i realise tht theres something i lyk alot. haha. i love trekking. the feeling is so nice. is not tiring, but its lyk a trip u leant sth frm it. after this whole thing i find myself different. so different. of course i look blacker but in terms of thoughts. yeah.

tnks to huiyan, bell, jina for the ties. the performance will be the greatest event co had this yr!! co is fun becuz theres u guys. when u guys left, im left with four walls, lao zheng n a bunch of unfriendly ppl. i miss the snrs! come back more often lah. anyone of ur presence make my day lor. cuz u all sit behind me then can tok lah. yah. i cant stand dont tok. lol.

progress report was much better than i tot it would be. at least i didn do so badly n maintained the distinctionSSS n my phys is so surprising, as well as chem. com hum is a disapointment. so wht if i got 3rd in class with a b3. it aint any gd cuz i could have gotten an a1. i really hope they count it separately lor. then bio is maintain lor. the As gave me hope to do better. to 32, u guys r a bunch of cute ppl. which we all need time to get to noe each other. if u guys juz wanna shut urself up, go ahead. this 2 yrs will be miserable for u but not for me. juz smile lah. wont die de. im giving way liao. i see some improvements too. so yeah. i say thank you. a big one.

life is total mess. im glad i still have u all lor.
i love puff.
i love bell.
i love ah wan.
i love chao tah.
i love the snrs.
i love the jnrs.
u gave me courage to walk down. cuz if not i would have dropped dead.

total mess. u said things will be buried after the pahang trip. i really hope so. i trust ur words. really. one last time. trust me tht i trust ur words. how i wish i got the good half character of shimin. being able to smile n tok to ppl she dont lyk. being so adaptable. thts my prob. i dont give good face to ppl i dont lyk lor. thts why. so many probs. mess. messy. so messy.

when i needed someone, u're at somewhere else.

yeah. is not dead now, wan n jingjie. haha. lol. but its a sad post. more on pahang, nex post!

19:26:00